New Year's Resolutions Every Day!

I'm really not one for making New Year's resolutions, mostly because I think it's best to look at ourselves each day and decide what we need to do differently tomorrow. How can we make this world a little better?

My 7th grade science teacher said something that has resonated with me throughout my life. "We aren't the same person we were yesterday. Cells die and new ones replace them." It's a very subtle process, but it makes sense. It also gives us an opportunity to lose some emotional baggage (hindsight is always 20/20) and realize that each new day brings new opportunities.

So what is my resolution for tomorrow? I'm going to awaken with the goal to contact my son, Chris, who just had hernia surgery this morning, and see what I can do to help him and his wife. I'm then going to return a call to my brother-in-law in South Carolina and arrange to send a copy of the latest Chicken Soup for the Soul: Devotional Stories for Wives (in which I have an entry) to my sister-in-law. That's two good deeds for the day, although they are just for family.

Tomorrow, I will awaken and probably decide where to shop on Thursday for some great buys in clothing or other necessities that I can then donate. I'm sure that Kohl's and maybe the grocery store will be on that list. After that, well...you get the idea.

My blog focuses on "why we are here." To me, it's simple. We are here to care for one another. That isn't a one day or even a yearly goal. It's on-going, just as I think resolutions should be.

Happy 2014 (every day)!

Christmas in Heaven?

I know that things will be different in Heaven, but have you ever wondered if they celebrate Christmas? It is Jesus' birthday, but from my recall, the Bible doesn't talk about parties except for weddings such as the Wedding Feast in Cana and site of Jesus' first miracle (John 2:1).

Personally, even with the commercialism (that can be ignored), I love how we celebrate Christmas on earth. Although that has changed greatly through the centuries, it seems to bring a certain peace, even to those who don't believe in the origin of this holiday. Sometimes, we Christians even have moments of forgetting "the "reason for the season."

But I love giving gifts. That is one reason why I believe it shouldn't just be at Christmas. I believe we are innately inspired to do so. Ephesians 2:10 states: "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." It is the act of giving that we celebrate at Christmas. We understand that Jesus gave the ultimate gift of his life for us.

Everything is supposed to be better in Heaven. Everything good that we enjoyed on earth should, in some form, be improved. But things don't really matter, so what would we give? Perfect love is supposed to be the abiding continuation so maybe it's a good idea to get some practice here on earth.

It's not just the sharing of our resources; it's the sharing of ourselves. It's taking time to chat with someone who is lonely; it's working side by side with someone who is engaged in an activity; it's encouragement of other's interests; it's valuing others with love through words and actions; and it's worship that brings us together as a community.

Along with our gifts of things, every one of the aforementioned can be done on earth now. So while we're exchanging things, let's remember that Christmas is about love - not just our family and friends, but mankind.

Merry Christmas to All!

Ready and Waiting

I'm done! The final shopping trip to the grocery store to pick up items for my annual Christmas Eve Open House occurred earlier this afternoon, and all gifts are wrapped and under the tree.

I'm not quite finished as early as last year, but I still have time to breathe and really enjoy what the season is all about. I'll drop off a few gifts tomorrow and then my errands will be complete, too.

Although I've finished my good deeds for the holiday, I'm sure there will be more opportunities that find me. But the most fun of all is hearing what others are doing, too.

My friend, Beth, called to tell me about her 9 year old granddaughter who decided she wanted to do something special for her great-grandmother (Beth's mother) this year. Claire managed to connect with Hy-Vee's delivery service to send a special surprise. She decided to grocery shop for her grandmother so she wouldn't have to brave the cold and possibly inclement weather. Choosing an assortment of foods, she even included toilet paper!

Children who learn the value and blessings of giving to others are a special joy. They are the ones who will make this world a better place, even as adults. They often learn philanthropy through adults who exemplify the spirit of giving to others. There is a certain wisdom that comes when a child realizes the goodness and benefits of giving and not just receiving.

I recall when my young, great-niece Zoe insisted on spending her own money to buy an angel necklace for me. It was such a touching thing to do, especially because she knew I was grieving the loss of my dear husband. Her sister, Sammi, followed suit the next year by crocheting an angel for me after learning the art.

I also recall when my great-nephew, B.J.. bought a gift for me just because he wanted to. B.J. faces some challenges of his own, so this sweet gesture was twice as meaningful.

We often think we need to care for children, but they are equally great influences in our lives, too. They make us stop to realize what is really important in life - love. That translates to how we care for one another, and focusing on others is how we make this world a better place. Biblically speaking, the New Testament is about love, beginning with God's gift of Christ.

Here's hoping that you, too, will finish early all the preparations for Christmas, and then have time to reflect on what makes our lives worthwhile. It isn't the gift of things; it's the gift of ourselves to others.

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Themes

I admit to watching and liking some of the secular Christmas movies, but I'm beginning to lose patience with the same theme over and over.

How many times can you watch Dickens' A Christmas Carol being adapted into a controlling, cold-hearted workaholic's redemption? Or, how many times can you watch the prodigal son or daughter reluctantly returning home and ultimately finding joy in celebrating Christmas? Or how about the bad business prospector who wants to tear down part of the town in the name of progress but has a change of heart, or the hero or heroine prevents him from doing so?

Although I like the animated shows like Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, I grow weary of the idea of cancelling Christmas because of Santa. You can also add that focus to the mix of Lifetime's and the Hallmark Channel's other themes noted above.

Is there a problem with at least some people celebrating Christmas Eve in these movies by going to church? I'd almost bet that most of the viewers who like what Lifetime and the Hallmark Channel offer go, even if it's the only church service attended all year.

I know that many people celebrate Christmas as secular and nothing more, but I think there is a missed opportunity. I'm not suggesting converting anyone to Christianity through this media, but it would be nice once in a while to have a small acknowledgement of what Christmas is really about.

While I don't think that much will change unless authors like Debbie MacComber cranks out more adaptable movies like "Mrs. Miracle," which features an angel who provides needed Christmas intervention, I'm beginning to more closely screen what I watch.

At one time, I watched anything remotely Christmas-oriented. Now, I spend more time reading Christmas-themed books. It doesn't need to be an in-your-face type of book, just one that recognizes in some way what it's really all about.

Barring any new and unique Christmas-themed shows, I intend to pull out my DVD's of It' s a Wonderful Life, Alastair Sim's version of A Christmas Carol, and yes, even A Christmas Story and Miracle on 34th Street.  After all, part of me is still a kid at heart. And just like Virginia, I still believe, but in a little more than just Santa.

Give to Those Who Ask and Even Those Who Don't

We are in the season for giving - giving thanks for our many blessings, sharing our bounty, and showing appreciation of and to our fellowman. 

I love buying things for others and knowing that I've done something to brighten or ease the life of someone else. It's almost selfish because I think I am rewarded more than the recipients of my benevolence. I also believe that we are wired to care for our fellowman.  Philippians 2:13 states: "...for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose." Whatever you believe, I'm glad the inspiration is there!

The trick to giving, now and throughout the year, is simply to be aware. Sales are always around us.
I have found many bargains recently, and no need for Black Friday shopping. What is shared below is just to give you examples of how easy it is to be generous without spending a great deal.

Hy-Vee has a box of Russell Stover chocolates that is nearly two pounds and over 2 feet long for $10. Now the question is: Where should it find a good home? It could be one of the emergency stations for fire and police, a nursing facility, or maybe a great present for someone who is not likely to receive one. I'm certain the right destination will reveal itself to me, or I'd love for you to comment to this blog as to where you think it should go. Come up with a better idea and I will select a winner who will receive a copy of my first book, Christmas: A Season for Angels. Tell your friends and family to comment with their ideas, too!

I also purchased additional toys from Kohl's today with a $20 Kohl's cash certificate plus a little extra ($11). I even received 15% off of the already 40% off sale which allowed me to purchase a tea set, and three games. I'll add that to two new snuggle pets that light up the ceiling which were purchased at my church's holiday bazaar last Saturday ($10), and a large Marvel art kit ($14 from a previous sale and 30% discount), and I've got a great donation. My total outlay was just $35 for seven fun presents!

While I write checks to some charities, I like giving toys to the women's shelter. Abused women arrive with their children on or before the holiday without having been signed up on an adoptee list. It's traumatic enough for the kids without missing presents.

There is also the senior adoptee program for low-income seniors or seniors who have no one to buy for them. Most cities have some form of this, but in Lawrence, it's the Douglas County Senior Center.

Usually I purchase a microwave for someone who has only requested that one big item, but there are many who have a list and the adopter is only asked to pick one thing from it. All adopters are asked to also purchase a $50 or more grocery certificate. This year, my adoptee wanted a different big item which I found at a greatly reduced price at Home Depot. It's all anonymous so there is a special feeling of giving.

The bottom line is that it doesn't cost much to be generous if you look around. My family really isn't in need of much so for the last few years, I and my sister (who lives in the same city), brother-in-law and two nephews and their families have exchanged gifts of no more than $10 each. The rest is given to those who really are in need. And while I still spoil my two sons and daughter-in-law, they also engage in philanthropy as well.

I know that I am blessed to have more than I really need, and with that extra, I'm going to do my best to share with as many as I can. Now you can, too, by just being aware. Happy Thanksgiving and shopping!

Better Early Than Late

Yes, I know that it is a little too early for some to begin decorating for Christmas. I just don't happen to be one of them.

Last year, I left my Christmas tree in one piece so that it would be easier to decorate and I could do it more quickly. That also means decorating the light pole in front of my home with a lit garland, running greenery through the spindles of the stairway to the second story, decorating the mantel, and placing other bits of Christmas décor throughout.

This year I am going to be a little earlier than usual. The weather is to take a nasty turn on Tuesday and I don't want to decorate outside when it's 40 degrees and rainy. So on Monday, when it is in the 60s, my neighbors will be greeted with the first signs of the season, or maybe not. They may be thinking as I am.

I do love Christmas although it is somewhat bittersweet. I miss my loved ones who have transitioned to eternity, especially my husband, Steve. It was so much fun to celebrate holidays with him. He let me be a big kid, and then joined in the fun.

But this is also the time that I think of the real meaning of Christmas. Had Christ not been born, I would have no hope of seeing the departed ones I love. The best gift I could ever receive is being reunited with them, and then with those who will follow me.

While many people will grouse about the Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving, it isn't a problem for me. I'm thankful every day for my many blessings and for the gift of hope. So, at this time, I can truly say: better early than late.

Your Passion Says It All

My mother once said to me, “Vicki, it’s a good thing you are a preschool director, otherwise, people would think you are weird.” That was said after I explained one year what I was going to do in celebration of Halloween.

It’s no secret to those who know me that I am just a big kid at heart. I love anything to do with having fun in celebrating holidays. And that brings to mind an issue of faith.

People don’t know that I love celebrating holidays because I tell them or forward an email. They know because of what I do to show my interest through actions. The same, I hope, could be said of my faith.

I don’t believe that people are truly converted to any religion by force or guilt. Jesus certainly didn’t teach that way, and as far as I know, I’ve never heard of leaders of other religions successfully doing so either. You can make people act a certain way, but you cannot change hearts unless the spirit within the person is willing. I trust that God is the one who makes that happen.

When the right opening occurs, I am happy to share my faith, but I also hope that my actions are conduits for those opportunities. I am far from perfect, and I try very hard not to commit egregious errors that will make others question the Christian way of life. After all, the Bible is quite adamant about not leading others astray.

 
Matthew 18:6 states: “But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.” OUCH! That assumes, of course, someone is already a believer, but I am guessing that if one’s actions push a potential believer away, that isn’t too good either.

So, show your passion for what drives you, but don’t ask me if I am saved. Don’t send an email to me that tries to guilt me into passing it on in order to show my belief. Instead, show me how you live. Give me inspiration to live my life better. Let your actions speak for the truth, and then celebrate life. That’s what I hope to do.

Have a great and safe Halloween!

 

 

 

A Pleasant Surprise

I recently attended a performance of "Fox on the Fairway" at the New Dinner Theatre in Overland Park, KS. Dyan Cannon was to be the celebrity actor, but we did not see her until the end of the show when she came onto the stage with her crutches. The accidental injury to her ankle prevented her from appearing in the play.

Ms. Cannon took the opportunity to say hello and even offered a Q & A to the audience. That's when the surprise occurred. She described herself as an old-fashioned, moral person, and a believer! I later learned via her book, Dear Cary (the memoir she wrote about her marriage to Cary Grant) that she is also Jewish.

Why was I pleasantly surprised at her announcement of believing in God? The previous night I watched just 45 minutes of a movie, and despite some well known and respected actors (Robert DeNiro, Diane Keaton, Susan Sarandon, Topher Grace, Amanda Sigfried), the film was both vulgar and profane. I decided halfway through the movie that Netflix could have it back and it would get a one-star rating from me.

I'm not a prude, but I sometimes wonder what the people who make some movies are thinking. Some screenwriters not only fail at basic grammar many times, but their vocabulary doesn't seem to be extensive when it comes to writing colorful words in the dialog. Does using the same curse word over and over again (you know what one I mean), and gratuitous nudity really make people come to see the movie?

Perhaps my biggest concern is that some moviegoers think the vocabulary and behavior, spoken and shown in the movies, are representative of real life. Personally I don't think it is, but if I'm wrong,  then I wish to remain blissfully ignorant of the real world. The same goes for what passes as entertainment on some reality shows.

But my big question is why such talented actors chose to do such a low-class film? Perhaps they do not understand, or even care, that some individuals like myself will be very hesitant to see what movies they make in the future. In any case, I'm not the one to judge their actions. I'm just the one to decide if I want to waste my time watching bad cinema.

I keep thinking about Proverbs 11:27 - "He who seeks good finds goodwill, but evil comes to him who searches for it." I guess you know what this optimist chooses!

A Personal Reminder Lessson

I have just completed my notes for a presentation that will be given tonight to fellow Stephen Ministers. The subject is "How the Bible Tells Us to Make This World a Better Place." The difficult part was narrowing down the subject matter because the Bible is full of examples and guidance.

This past weekend I attended a writers convention in Wichita. It was extremely well run and there was an opportunity to meet many wonderful and talented people. The volunteers who had organized this did an exceptional job, but once again, I was reminded about judgment. The Bible has much to say about judgment and there are many admonishments about it. Avoiding it is one thing I will address in my presentation, and I will give you an example of what I experienced at later in this blog.

Every time I read a letter to the editor in our local paper, I cringe when someone tries to cite a Biblical passage to support his or her view. While some may be justified in what they say, I know of no one who has been converted because someone has judged and admonished them in a particular manner. In fact, it can sometimes have the opposite effect.

Corinthians 2:11 says "For who among men knows the thoughts of  man except the man's spirit within him? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God." Personally, I'm very glad to leave judgment up to God, especially on more controversial matters. For the record,  I'm not talking about obvious topics like murder and stealing.

Now to the matter of my experience this weekend. One of the volunteers was very stoic and I never saw her crack a smile. She didn't initiate any conversations, and quite frankly, she didn't look all that happy. She was definitely someone who most of us would choose to avoid.

I again encountered her in what we call a read-around, an opportunity for writers and poets to share their works with their peers. She read two poems and I did not have an opportunity to talk with her until the next day. I then made a point to do so.

I told this person that I truly enjoyed her poems, and was rewarded with one of the biggest smiles I've ever seen. From then on, she was friendly and talkative. She was, like many people, just an introvert.

I have been misjudged and I don't like it. But worse than that, I'd really not want to know how many times I've misjudged.

Handling Conflict

Most of us don't like conflict and will do whatever we can to avoid it. But still, there are a few individuals who seem to thrive on it.

Fortunately, the Bible does tell us how to handle it in Matthew 18:15-16: "If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.'" Now if anyone has found that to be easy, please let me know.

When I was a new preschool director, I quickly learned how easily rumors spread and how devastating results of conflict can be. I wish I had known of the aforementioned verse before I finally figured it out on my own.

I truly questioned (and still do) the motives of anyone who would tell others what terrible things were said about them. It has no purpose other than to add to the contention. Finally, I made it mandatory to handle conflicts one-on-one, and if it couldn't be resolved between the two individuals, then they were to come to me. That worked!

To this day, I deplore rumors. I currently know of an individual who has been hurt in the past and wishes to make the life of those she holds responsible as unsettling as possible by spreading untruths or putting a negative spin on everything. The truly sad thing is that she could be very likable if she wanted to be.

So what can be done to stop such conflicts, especially if someone is not willing to halt such behavior? It's best to remember that those who try to make others miserable are also miserable, too. In such cases, I think it comes down to prayer and asking God to give guidance in dealing with the issue, and to help heal the person's wound so that the behavior ceases. At least that's my plan.

Reflections on Getting Older

At one time, I awaited my birthday much like Christmas. It couldn't arrive fast enough. Now that I'm older, that has changed significantly, at least in regard to my birthday.

On the positive side, doesn't wisdom accompany each year of life? I'm no Soloman, but there are a few lessons I've learned over the years. For one thing, I don't feel the need to please everyone, but I do feel the need to do the right thing. It's a no-brianer that we all have a responsibilty for this world and to each other. Looking back over the last year, it's important for me to see that I've made a positive difference.

Appropriate appearance is still important for me as well as others, but I'm much less judgmental. We are Biblically cautioned many times about judgment, so it's become a conscious effort of mine not do so rashly, especially when it comes to placing value superficially. The result is that I'm less concerned about my own vanity and more open to some wonderful friendships that might not have occurred.

I also find myself to be more aware of my actions. I don't want others to see my imperfections as an excuse to label all Chritians or to deny themselves an opportunity to explore a belief. It's my goal to live my life in such a way that makes others see that this is how we should live.

My bucket list from younger years has changed significantly. The urgency to do many things, especially the things that are more self-absorbed and oriented, have been replaced with what truly gives life meaning. Pleasing myself fails in comparison to making a difference for others and leaving this world a little better place than when I arrived.

I appreciate the everyday things a bit more like a gorgeous sunset, the sweet smell of lilacs in the wind, and especially trees. My love affair with the latter has been on-going for some time, but I eagerly await the change of seasons just to see nature's response. I count these things among my blessings.

I am also thankful to everyone for their well wishes on my birthday and offers of assistance during my recent bout with an infection. Know that you are also among my most cherished blessings.

So when my birthday arrives next year, I hope to have learned more about being a better human being. It's a never-ending goal we should all set for ourselves. That's how we truly make this world a better place.

Optimism Beats the Alternative

I am a born optimist. It's how I choose to live my life and it saddens me to think of those who can only see negatives. You know this type of person because they are difficult to be around, and  unfortunately, they are also the people most in need of God's love and yours.

When Jesus said to "love one another as I have loved you," he gave us a difficult command. Living your life in simple terms to "love your neighbor as yourself" and "... do to others what you would have them do to you" (Matthew 7:12 NIV) is a great way to live, but it doesn't come easy. Perhaps the biggest opposition to that is judgment, and we humans are great at it!

We judge with both prejudice and pride, and often do so unknowingly. Sometimes there are even seemingly innocent influences that we don't even notice. If you are surrounded by, listen to, and read negatives all day long, that is definitely going to slant your outlook on life.

If you listen to music or play video games that promote violence, or watch movies and shows that exploit and degrade others, it can't help but influence you. It might even be a joke, or a TV reality show that documents people at their worst behavior. If you are entertained by those kinds of things, just be cognizant of how you might generalize people who possess a tiny resemblance to those negatives.

The key to remaining optimistic is to keep things in perspective. Just because you hear about atrocities doesn't make the entire world a bad place, especially when there is so much good we can do. In fact, I firmly believe that our humanity is best shown when we feel outrage upon learning of bad things because if most of us didn't do the right things, this world would be intolerable.

Instead of negatives, try reading great inspirational magazines such as Living World at: Living Word Magazine and watching shows such as "The Secret Millionaire." Make note of the many positive things that happen, and live to serve others. No one can wallow in self pity if the focus is on others.

Proverbs 11:27 (NIV) states: "He who seeks good finds goodwill, but evil comes to him who searches for it." As for me, I'd rather be an optimist and choose the good.

The Goodness of Prayer

I admit that sometimes I'm a little confused when it comes to prayer. I don't just pray every night, I talk to God many times throughout the day. Strangely enough, even though I wrote the draft of this blog several days ago, prayer became a topic of discussion in the religion section of the Lawrence Journal World today.

Like many supplicants, I ask for healing, comfort, peace, etc. for those in need with special focus on those for whom I've been asked or especially want to pray. Recently, I've begun to pray that those circumstances be known to the one for whom I pray. Not everyone I pray for is of the same belief that I am, so it more like my asking God to do what is best for them and make it known to them.

One of my favorite parts of the Lord's prayer is "thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven." Wow! Can you imagine anything better than that? But it does make one wonder why we need to offer a special prayer for healing, etc. Isn't God's will what we should really pray for since we know that He wishes only good for us? And how great would it be if earth were really like Heaven?

A pastor once explained that our special prayers are a way for us to acknowledge that God is in control. It's heartbreaking to pray for healing of a loved one when it doesn't occur. After all, doesn't Matthew 7:7 say "Ask and it will be given to you...?" Matthew 17:20 also tells us "... if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move."
Like so much other misunderstood scripture, we sometimes want to take things verbatim and apply it to all things instead of what was actually attended.

We don't like to be disappointed, and sometimes it's a blessing that we don't get what we ask for. I can then think of no greater prayer that to ask that God's will be done, even when it's contrary to ours.

The Best Investment

We automatically think that investments are things we put our trust into whether it's financial or emotional support. We buy real estate, stocks, antiques, etc. all in the hopes of receiving some type of personal gain. But, we often forget the most important investment that is our fellowman.

Believing in someone is the most important commitment we can make, yet we often fail to show it. How difficult is it to say encouraging words to someone who is doing a good job? What about a child who just accomplished a difficult task?

Occasionally we may underestimate the power we have. We don't speak up or take action because we think what we do won't matter, BUT it does. The popular phrase, "you can't save the world" is not entirely correct. Maybe one person can't do it by him or herself, but if everyone contributed, the impact could and would change the world.

A case in point is feeding the hungry. It's sad to note that there is enough food for everyone on the planet, but the uneven distribution of it allows for thousands to die each day from starvation. A little investment in those in need could make quite a difference.

It's a simple thing to pick up a few extra items at the grocery store and give to a food pantry. If you attend church, many have receptacles in which those items can be placed. Many churches will also accept donations to purchase items for the local pantry, and funds given directly to organizations that feed the hungry are always appreciated. There are also Internet sites that allow you to purchase livestock to help a family become independent farmers in a third world country.

We can't deny there is need around the world and at home, and there will always be until we make an investment in our fellowman. The reward of making the world better for someone else is priceless. We, who have been blessed, have that power and responsibility. There is no waiting for this investment to make a positive yield.

Bragging or Sharing?

One of my favorite Biblical versus is Hebrews 10:24 - "Let us consider how to spur one another to love and good deeds." In fact, it was the basis of my third book.

One of the best ways to motivate others is to set an example. I think back to the time I heard of a woman who buys umbrellas at the dollar store and keeps them in her car to give out to those who are caught in a sudden downpour. Immediately, I followed suit because it was such a great and simple thing to do.

Now here is the dilemma - We aren't supposed to boast about our good deeds, but if no one hears about them, how do they follow our example? Jesus motivated people with the use of parables, and personal example. We are creatures who need ideas, and something to follow.

So, is there a difference between sharing and boasting? Absolutely! Boasting is self-gratification. Sharing is something we are supposed to do, and what better example than to share what we have been blessed to receive!

When I was writing Simple Things to Make This World a Better Place, it was difficult for many people to tell me about their good deeds. They didn't want to seem boastful, and many thought that you aren't supposed to tell others what you do - period! But, if you share your good deeds with others and make it clear why you are doing so, no one can think that you are doing it to receive praise. Of course, giving in anonymity is often the most rewarding personally, but it doesn't exactly provoke others to do likewise if they never know about it. You can't follow a lead if it isn't there.

The bottom line is to not be afraid to share good ideas for ways to care for your fellowman. Just remember and make it clear why you do it. It's already helped me to add additional content to my book.

Doing the Right Thing

Just the other day, I received a reimbursement check from my prescription drug insurance company due to overcharging on the copay. Since it was for a drug costing over $4,100+ per month, I am fortunate to receive some assistance on the exorbitant amount of the copay through the Chronic Disease Fund (CDF). The check really belonged to them.

I decided to make a call to CDF and ask them what to do with the check. The very sweet customer service representative asked the amount - $48 and change, - and said she would need to email her supervisor. Apparently, this was an issue she had never before encountered, but one I hope she needs to address from others who receive a similar check.

After a brief pause, she stated that her supervisor said that I could keep it or send it back, and I wasn’t “obligated” in any way to do the latter. Although that was very nice to say I could keep it, not being obligated is not the same as being right. I didn’t pay the copay – they did. So of course, I asked the address of where to send my personal check since I could not forward the check sent to me.

Why did I choose to do the right thing? Aside from the fact that the money is restored to the fund to help others, it wasn’t because I’m above temptation, I assure you. It was because of the guidance that popped into my head via Luke 16:10 – “Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much.” Message received - God's gentle reminder to me to be trustworthy.

It’s just another way how the Bible tells me I can help to make this world a better place, one simple thing at a time.

Difference is a Beautiful Thing

It's no secret - I love trees. I am captivated by pictures of tree-lined roads and photos of a single tree standing in the middle of an open field. Anyone who has visited my home knows this because almost every painting that adorns my walls has a tree as the focal point.  My late husband, Steve, and I even had a tree on our commute to work that we "mentally" adopted.

My love of these God-given creations began as a child. Under a stately, old Mulberry tree was my favorite place to play. Not only did it shield me from the sun in the summer, but it offered a sweet snack that often stained my hands. Its lower branches were also near to the ground so that I could climb and see the world from a better view. Later, it served as a refuge to animals like a fox and its kits, a visiting fawn, and even ground hogs.

I'm also mesmerized by clouds, observing them from both the ground and from an airplane. It doesn't matter what kind; I love them all. In fact, one of my favorite weather moments is when a hot sunny day turns to gray with a cold front approaching. It threatens a storm, but the anticipation is electric. And who hasn't looked at the soft, billowy clouds and discerned a shape of something familiar?

It's when I take the time to see what God hath made that makes my life one of wonder. It reinforces my faith that there is something more to our existence, and the belief in a creator far greater than I. It's when the world can be seen for its beauty, and not for what frailties we humans encompass.

Strangely enough, I believe humans are God's greatest creation, yet they are often the most difficult to appreciate. Just like trees and clouds, each one is unique, and sometimes that is what we don't appreciate. Prejudice exists because of difference - not just the color of the skin, but ethnicity, religion, gender, sexual orientation, and age.

But what if every tree and cloud were alike? Would we appreciate them as much? I think not, and that is somewhat of a paradox.

Blessed to Share

Is it really better to give than receive? Absolutely!

As I write this, I am thrilled and excited about two recent shopping experiences. I write not to boast, but to express my joy and to demonstrate how easy and inexpensive it is to make a difference.

On Wednesday, my sister, Marsha, and I went to Kohl's. Anyone who has shopped this department store knows that their sales and clearance prices are legendary, especially if you have their store credit card and a 30% discount coupon. I didn't have anything that I needed, but it was a great opportunity to purchase exceptional deals for those in need. I bought six sweaters and two tops with a gross retail value of $252 for $23.93 including tax. Those will go to Osawatomie State Mental Hospital where my daughter-in-law's father works as an activity supervisor. Many patients arrive with nothing more than the clothes they are wearing and no family to clothe them.

On Thursday night, I had dinner with my closest friends, Darwin and Susan. We planned to shop afterwards. For the past few years, Susan, I, and our friend, Belinda, have pooled our resources to buy two new air conditioners or fans (requested by the agency we chose last year).

We decided to check Home Depot to compare prices with another store I checked on line.  We found LG 5000 BTU units for $119. Darwin suggested that we buy three this year and decided to ask for a discount since these were going to a charity. He asked for a manager, and the young lady who helped us made contact via her walkie-talkie. She offered us $100 off the total of three units. Wow! Split three ways, we could donate three air conditioners at a cost to each of us of only $93.13 including tax! I can't wait to hear how much fun Darwin and Susan have when they deliver these to Penn House, especially since the agency was ecstatic about receiving two units. Thank you Home Depot!

Sometimes agencies ask for fans because they are less expensive and they can meet the needs of more people. But fans circulate hot air, and the elderly, those with medical issues, and young children can be very susceptible to heat-related, life-threatening issues. That is why we buy air conditioners. We can't give to everyone in need, but that won't and shouldn't stop us from doing what we can.

It's really that easy to make a difference. We are so blessed to be on the giving rather than receiving end, and sharing our blessings makes this a better world for us and others.

Making Opportunities

Recently I was accompanied by a friend to attend a conference in Miami. This particular friend has been the subject of one of my Examiner articles as well as a contributor to my latest book. She has earned my admiration and respect because she doesn't wait for opportunities to do good things - she makes them. And, I was again witness to some of them on this trip.

Our plane to Ft. Lauderdale arrived at the gate, and it was soon announced that there was a mechanical problem with an unknown delay. While I passed the time chatting away with two women lined up in wheelchairs, Belinda realized something the rest of us did not.

During our two hour wait, she watched a number of able-bodied individuals make the trek to the bathroom that was twenty yards or more away, but no one thought about the two elderly ladies in wheelchairs. She quickly hustled to their sides and offered to push them to the restroom. Both readily accepted and were extremely grateful for this kind gesture.

Belinda uses all of her resources (time, money, and effort) in the best possible way - doing whatever she can to help others. Her actions are what we Christians recognize as heeding Luke 12:48 "...From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded..."

In her years as a landlord, she has never raised the rent on her long-term occupants. She makes purchases that she may not need just because it will help the people who are selling. She routinely buys items for people in need, regardless of whether they are strangers or someone she knows.

When we returned to our home airport after the conference, I was again witness to one of Belinda's kind gestures. As luggage was spewed onto the carousel, she began turning them vertically for easy retrieval. Nothing big, but certainly a nice convenience for anyone trying to retrieve them.

She is an unsung hero who performs these acts because she knows we are on this earth to care for one another. She sets an excellent example and the bar pretty high for the rest of us.

A Grateful American

Recently I was conversing with a gentleman and his wife as we rode in a shuttle to our hotel in Ft. Lauderdale. I was a bit surprised when he said he was thrilled to be a part of the U.S. – the greatest country in the world.

My surprise wasn’t because I disagreed with him, but because he mentioned becoming a naturalized citizen after living 40 years in England. His English was impeccable so I surmise that he initially spent his youth as an inhabitant of a British territory. His ethnicity was also unknown, but it was obvious that he loved being an American citizen.  

His enthusiasm reminded me how much we take things for granted. Most of us have enough food to eat, clean water, clothing to wear, and a lifestyle that lets us enjoy leisure time. We complain about politicians, but don’t vote. We grumble because we can’t afford some of the finer things owned by others. We walk complacently by homeless people and those in need. We are blessed, but often reluctant to share with others. We worry about the future while millions worry just about today.

So this 4^th of July, I hope we can each celebrate with both a grateful and caring heart. We may not be able to solve the world’s problems or even make a dent in what people need, but we can make a difference for at least one person.

So as fireworks light up the sky and picnic feasts are spread, I am going to thank God for timing and location – for less toil than our ancestors and for being born in the U.S. And then I’m going to do something to show that gratitude by sharing my blessings. I’m not sure just how yet, but I know that either the opportunity will come to me or I will make it.

Expectations for Religious Rites

I recently witnessed the baptism of our associate pastor's baby daughter. It was a joyous occasion for the congregation as well as many out-of-town family and friends of Pastor Jen and her husband, Chris.

Not all denominations baptize babies or children, but we Lutherans do so as a promise to God to raise the child as a Christian. When the child is older and a young adolescent, he or she takes confirmation classes to accept the Baptism that was performed as an infant.

 As I witnessed the promise of these parents, I knew it would be fulfilled, and then I wondered about the many babies and children who are baptized, but are never seen again except maybe on Easter and Christmas when their parents attend.  

Grace is an important part of the Christian faith, but as Pastor Jen once pointed out in her sermon, behavior changes because of it - not because of having to, but because of wanting to. Would there be a church if it depended upon the support of those who only attend twice a year or less often? Would they have a site for baptisms and funerals? That's easy to answer.

Thankfully, there are others who respond to their faith on a regular basis. They do so out of thanksgiving and a desire to worship God. The Bible says it is impossible to take one's faith seriously without deeds. James 2:14 "What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds?" It's the old "actions speak louder than words" in practice. Deeds alone might not get you into Heaven, but they are a consequence of receiving grace.

It is not for me to judge those who do not practice their faith or fulfill their promise of Baptism. I was once one of those" maybe once or twice a month" attendees when our children were young.  But, I’m not really sure why some people find the ritual important, but the follow-through not.  

 

Personally I don't think God will care if we participated in a ritual, forwarded an email out of guilt, or professed to have faith, but I think He will care that we live what we truly believe. No man knows the heart and mind of God, but I know I feel much better in trying to live my faith.

 

 

Words Are a Blessing

     I love words, no matter if I write them or read them. They are a blessing and make a difference in my life as well as help me to make a difference in other's lives, too. Words motivate us, entertain us, and make us think.
     As an author, I'm given many opportunities to read and review the written works of fellow authors. Lately, it has been my pleasure to read some very wonderful books, and of myriad genre. The reviews I have recently posted on Amazon.com are all five stars. If the book doesn't deserve that rating, I will not post one. Books should enrich your life and those are the ones worth knowing about.
     Tracy Million Simmons is a fellow board member of the Kansas Authors Club. She has written an excellent little book called Tiger Hunting. It's entertaining and very imaginative since it takes place in the western part of Kansas.
     Dr. Ed Mrkvicka's book, The Sin of Forgiveness, is highly provocative. He makes a compelling argument that forgiving someone who is not repentant is contrary to what the Bibles tells us. Whether you agree or not, it causes us to examine hardcore beliefs and faith which can only help us to grow and become more resolute in what we understand as truth.
       Scalpel in the Sun is Dr. Rene Chang's account of his days as a surgeon in Saudi Arabia in the 70s and early 80s. Not only does he treat the reader to a different culture, but throws in some easy to understand medical knowledge as well.
     J.J. Hibbert has written Unconventional, a novel that resonates with his fellow authors, but is worth reading by others as well. It's about a struggling young author who overcomes odds to write and make his first novel a success. It's a good read for the triumph of the spirit.
     Mary Queen of France: The Story of the Youngest Sister of King Henry VIII by Jean Plaidy (alias Victoria Holt) is an excellent historical novel. There is something to be learned about one of England's most famous kings as well as the unfortunate obligations to which even the elite must succumb.
     Frank McCourt's, Angela's Ashes, is a memoir that will touch the hearts of those who have compassion for their fellowman. He deftly illustrates the poverty in both Ireland and the U.S. before WWII with his heart-wrenching depiction of life as a child growing up in those circumstances
        Song of Achilles (P.S.) by Madeline Miller uses information from The Odyssey and The Iliad as well as other books of that time to offer another interesting account of the Trojan War. As with most books, there are some surprises that conflict with Hollywood's version.
     These are just a few of my favorite recent books, but I hope they will give you some options that you might not have previously considered. Reading something out of the norm enriches us and exposes us to the uncommon. If you like one or more of these books, I encourage you to contact any of the present-day authors if a way of doing so is given. Nothing is as gratifying to an author than to know they have made a difference through words, whether that is to make you think or simply give you pleasure. Now is your turn to reciprocate.
    

Memories

Yesterday, I received a CD of the rocket launch last year that carried a portion of my husband's ashes into space. It is difficult to believe the anniversary of that spectacular moment was May 22.

While I did not cry during the actual event as I expected to do, I made up for it last night while watching and remembering the culmination of a promise. Steve always loved anything related to space, and I was able to tell him my plans to send a portion of his ashes into "the final frontier." After waiting more than five years, I finally saw that come to fruition.

Shortly after watching the video, I received a call from my "grandchild of the heart." We are not related by blood or legally, but by love, and I have been close to him and his family since he was 2 years old.  He told me his grandfather had just passed away after a difficult battle with cancer. Because Nick often accompanied Jose and his sister, Sara, to my house every Christmas Eve, I can keenly feel their family's loss - he was a good man to know.

Watching the video and hearing of Nick's passing reminded me that it is often the memories that cause us the greatest pain when we lose someone. We grieve that there will be no more memories to make, and it will be some time before we are able to push away all of the bad and remember the good things that we shared. That is one reason I recommend in my, book Simple Things to Make This World a Better Place, that a personal note always be written with any sympathy card that just expresses the wish that memories will comfort the grieving.

Before Nick passed on, I was able to give the family a booklet that gives answers to many of faith's greatest questions. They are questions derived from the book, Heaven, which I have shared with many others. The author, Reverend Randy Alcorn, spent decades researching what the Bible says about Heaven (more than you think), and it answered exactly what I wanted to know. No, you don't sprout wings while drifting on a cloud and playing a harp, but you do have much to occupy your time.

I often joke that people want to go to Heaven because they know how bad Hell is, but the fact is we are often taught more about Hell than Heaven. Regardless of what your faith tells you about these two options, it's comforting to know more about where we hope and expect to spend eternity. And the best part is we will no longer need memories.

Surprises, surprises, surprises

As a subscriber to a number of writer newsletters, I recently learned that you can set Google alerts. For me, I chose Inspiration, Make a Difference, my name and the names of my books. These alerts have brought some very surprising and interesting results.

For instance, I discovered that Canada is offering money to senior citizens to use to make a difference. I've also clicked on links to read heartwarming stories of others who have done some remarkable things. And the best part is that these individuals range from the very young to the very old.

Just recently, two first graders enlisted the help of neighbors to raise funds for the victims of the Moore, OK tornado. Check out: Not too young to make a difference. But, there are many other everyday occurrences that many of us might not otherwise notice.

My sister, niece, and 11 year old great-niece (Sydney) recently visited over the holiday. On Friday, the four of us ventured to place flowers on the graves of my parents after making a brief stop by the Dollar Tree for some faux flowers to supplement the real ones. While there, Sydney insisted on gathering her own tribute for the great-grandparents she never knew. Later, watching her lovingly place those by the tombstone was approbation that no matter the age, anyone can do something good in this world.

No, she didn't feed the hungry, find a cure for cancer, or write a check to her favorite charity. But she did take time to show respect, not just to my parents, but to spend time reading the epitaphs of others in the cemetery. She demonstrated caring and compassion. And that does make this world a better place for all of us.

Help Me to Spread This Blog

Authors always want their works to be read, especially if there is a message they wish to impart. Count me among the guilty parties! (Be sure to read the last part of this post for a special incentive  to help me spread readership of this blog).

My latest book is based upon Hebrews 10:24: "Let us consider how to provoke one another to love and good deeds." I loved writing it more than anything I've ever been blessed to write. Why? Because it's my forte: Inspiration!

It was so much fun to discover the great many positive things others do or have done that can be repeated by any of us. And, it was especially exciting to discover that every good deed I ever thought of could be found in the Bible. I'm not a zealot, but I have a strong faith which I hope is exemplified by the way I live. I'm definitely flawed to be sure, but I try, and hopefully that is what others see.

Now to the incentive: To the first 10 readers of this post who acquire five new individuals to subscribe to this blog (it's FREE), I'll send you an autographed copy of Simple Things to Make This World a Better Place. Just access my webpage at: www.vickijulian.com and click on "Contact the Author" located at the bottom left, and send to me the last names of those who have signed up because of your referral. (Don't worry, their information is secure and they won't be contacted).

Let's make this world a better place!

Charitable Giving

Returning to our car after enjoying a Mother's Day dinner at a downtown restaurant yesterday, my two sons and I encountered a man who was obviously homeless. He was seated near one of the parking meters and across from an eatery with outside tables.

As we passed him, he asked, "Can you spare some small change?" It would have been easy to ignore him as so many other passersby were doing, After all, didn't the city install depositories downtown where people could give money for people like this man? The homeless aren't supposed to solicit alms anymore. But his gentle inquiry and humble nature caused me to flashback to another time.

Many years ago, I was dropping mail off inside the main post office on a very cold winter evening, and sitting just below the mail drop, was a homeless woman. She stared straight ahead, completely unaffected by my presence, and with all her worldly belongings strewn about. It was obvious that this was her respite from the cold.

I wanted to hand her money so that maybe she could find some creature comfort nearby in the form of a warm drink or food, but I didn't know how to do that without, perhaps, offending her. So what did I do? Nothing! and it has haunted me since then. I looked for her thereafter every time I had to drop off mail. I never saw her again and the opportunity to help was gone.

So, when someone asks me for money, I try to find a way to help. It might surprise others to know that in the Bible, Matthew 5:42 states: "Give to the one who asks you and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you." There are many other passages related to judgment, and it is clear that some things are left to God, not us.

When you know that someone is in need, regardless of whether you think they are deserving, I find it to be an opportunity to share many blessings. If I don't want to give money, I can find out if hunger is an issue and then buy something for the person to eat. I can buy a bus pass, I can direct someone to where they can find the assistance they need. I can acknowledge want.

Yes, I had quite a bit of change which I readily handed over to the man who asked. As I placed it into his dirty looking hands, he thanked me. It was really I who should say thanks to God because I was on the giving end and not the receiving.

There isn't any question in my mind as to why we are here. I think our purpose in life is simple - we are here to care for each other. Anyone who reads this blog will discover that my intent is to inspire others to do just that.

Please note that I'm going to base my words on Biblical wisdom because I am a Christian, BUT I think it is within everyone's power and responsibility to make this world a better place. So, whatever your belief, if you seriously want to make a positive difference and learn some wonderful ways to better the lives of others as well as yourself, then follow this blog. Together we'll discover great ideas for random acts of kindness, what you can do for your fellowman in special circumstances, and be inspired by the stories of others.

Feel free to share your own bits of wisdom in caring for your fellowman. I personally love Hebrews 10:24: "Let us consider how to provoke one another to love and good deeds." Let the journey begin!