2018 Happy or Not?

2017 was a banner year for me in many ways: I accomplished most of what I wanted to do like filing the final patent application for a new type of mobility walker; I had no major medical issues; and I lived comfortably without any worry of having enough food or paying my bills. My grateful heart tells me the latter two are the most important. Not every one is that fortunate.

A few years ago I wrote an Internet article for The Humanitarian Examiner-Topeka called "Make a Difference." The theme was always something anyone could do to make this world a better place. (I finally opted for this current blog format because I could make it faith-based.) My New Year's Resolution articles always gave suggestions for positive actions that could change the world for better. Now I have just one.

For two years, I have kept a journal. In it, I try to write daily something I did to make this world a better place. That makes me take positive action to consciously accomplish that as a daily goal. It's the best self-improvement concept I can think to do, and one I'll faithfully implement.

The new year will hold many exciting things for me including a grandson from my older son and daughter-in-law, and the wedding of my youngest son. From life experience, I know those will be the best of 2018. I also know that our lives are what we make them through our choices. Mine is to live my faith as best I can, and that means honoring my New Year's resolution daily.

Happy 2018!

The Right Time

I did something fun today. It was fun because it wasn't expected and the time was right.

In this season of gifting, it's easy to miss the simple giving that occurs year round. I'm talking about those individuals who do a little extra to make our lives easier, and those who volunteer to do the necessary things that we either can't or prefer not to do. Remembering them at Christmas is perfect.

I set out popcorn bins for the sanitation and recycle crews who make a special effort to collect my refuse nearer to my home instead of at the curb. My mail carrier is also so conscientious that he even caught and redirected a Christmas card sent to my previous home address 10 years ago! These are the obvious people to remember to thank.

But then I began to think about my church and how wonderful and blessed we are to worship there. I took boxes of gourmet chocolates to personally thank each of the five paid staff members, and wrote thank you notes to several of the volunteers who almost should have designated offices because of their countless efforts and time spent at the church.

And then I remembered, too, those who coordinate our pet pantry, organize lectors and ushers,  handle the sacristy, head Sunday School education and programs, serve on our outreach and internal committees, assist with church needs, and the list goes on and on. So, I wrote a simple thank you addressed to "All the Volunteers."  I asked our Parish Life Administrator to post it on the bulletin board in the hallway.

Christmas is the time to remember when the greatest gift of all was given. What better time to remember and acknowledge those who give of themselves all year? And, of course, the added bonus is that it was fun!

Merry Christmas, everyone!

The Real Christmas

Nope, it's not the apocalypse. I'm just writing a second blog in two days because Christmas is in my heart.

I didn't meet my goal to finish shopping for gifts by December 1, but for the most part, my list is complete minus a few little stocking stuffers, and my Christmas baking only has two items to go. But checking off my gift list and baking goodies isn't what put Christmas in my heart.

The real Christmas spirit came to me this year at my final church council meeting on the 27th of November.  I completely forgot it was my turn to offer the devotion at the beginning of the meeting so nothing was prepared, but the first thing that popped into my head was, of course, Christmas. (As I warned fellow council members, I'm sharing a brief portion of those thoughts now in this blog.)

Hebrews 10:24 − "Let us consider how to provoke one another to love and good deeds" is perhaps my favorite Bible verse. To me, it epitomizes what Jesus commanded us to do when he said, "Love one another." − John 13:34 (NIV) Mankind does that no better than at Christmastime.

This is the season when even non-Christians get into the spirit of giving and caring, but we of faith should keep that spirit year round. Showing love to our fellowman, I think, gives us a taste of God's love for us. When we give without restraint, but instead with compassion and the joy of sharing our blessings, we invoke a higher sense. For just a short time, we can feel the power and opportunity to make this world a better place. Wouldn't it be wonderful to keep Christmas in our hearts everyday?

Being Complacent

Our pastor recently gave a sermon on complacency. It's the mindset that allows others to "let somebody else do it." I keep thinking of Revelation 3:16 − "So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth." (NIV) Wow! That means complacency, and  its companion apathy, are dangerous. 

There is an old saying that "if you want to get something done, ask a busy person to do it." It's true. Busy doers are the ones who get things done. Unlike those who wait for someone else to take responsibility, they adopt the Nike motto and "just do it." 

Admittedly, we all are a little guilty of complacency in our lives. Personally, I know there are things I should do, but they just aren't a priority for me due to time, effort, resources or ability. But then there is something about which none of us should be complacent, and that is doing our part to make this world a better place. It can't occur without our being vested and committed.  

I've mentioned previously that I keep a journal of what I do each day to make this world a better place − it's my accountability to take responsibility. Some days it's quite impactful, and on others, it's as simple as giving a compliment. It's not so much about the action, but the desire to act in a positive way. None of us knows when our final day on earth will be, and while it's difficult to live every one of them as if it were the last, we need to take responsibility and act to make it count.

Don't expect the church to be there for you if you don't support it. Don't expect peace in the world if you cannot even find it in your own heart. Don't believe that someone else will stand up for justice in your place. Don't think it's up to other people to make the world a better place. Anything worth caring about is worthy of our taking action. 

So, with the season of love and caring upon us, we should each ask ourselves: What matters? and What can I do about it? We are more of an answer than we realize.

 

Being Grateful

I am grateful!

There is much research to support that people who are grateful are happier, healthier, and certainly more easy to be around. If that is true, and I think it is, then I have to say I am most grateful for my faith and my family.

It's pretty obvious why anyone would be grateful for his/her family. Family gives you an important reason to live, and to live generously. Family, in most cases, is our first introduction to love, and makes it easier to understand a loving relationship with God.

Now, faith is really quite different in many ways − it gives hope and a peace that "surpasses all understanding." And here is what it does especially for me:

• Dying isn't as much of an issue anymore. I know where I'm going, and I'm pretty confident in that. It's not because I'm such a great person or do good things (I also do and say some things I wish I didn't), but the confidence comes via grace. 
• I don't worry about things on my bucket list I might not get to do. I know that there are things I will still get to do in the afterlife, and they will be so much better.
• I believe I will be with loved ones again, and the ones I currently love on earth will be there too.
• Faith gives me a grateful heart to appreciate my many blessings, and I am an optimist because of it.
• With optimism, God let's me focus on what I can do and not what I can't. He gives me (and all of us) an opportunity to make this world a better place.
• I try to remember my purpose on earth is to care for my fellowman. If I can honor that and make someone's day (or even life) a little better, then I've served my purpose.
• I don't care if I'm famous or leave some lasting legacy with my name attached to it. I'd just love to know that I somehow made this world a little better because I lived. 
• I'm not focused on possessions as much as I am experiences, and doing something else with my resources to make things better for others.
• I realize that I'm not the one in charge. I don't decide the outcome on everything, and that makes me very happy. I'd hate to be the one who decides the fate of others, or selfishly makes decisions that benefit only me or those close to me. If I did have that power, I would probably ignore the needs of the rest of the world. Trusting in God's will, rather than mine, gives me peace knowing that good is at work. I don't always agree with what God allows, but I have to trust that He knows best for the world, and ultimately for me. 
• Lastly, faith has made me a better person. Trying my best to follow Jesus' teachings has given me a good road to follow. I don't always succeed, but when I fail, I know that at least God understands and still loves who I am.

I'm certain I could come up with a list to include hundreds of more reasons to be grateful, but for now, I'll just say that I'm grateful for my family and faith. And that pretty much includes the origins of all other things I could list in counting my blessings. So Happy Thanksgiving to all who read this blog, and may you have the same blessings of faith and family.

I Can't Wait

Some people choose Halloween as their favorite holiday. I like Halloween, but by far, Christmas is my favorite. I love buying gifts, the caring attitude of the season, the family time, etc.

Last year I was finished buying gifts in early December and I loved it. The only thing left was to enjoy living in the present to actually enjoy all the activities and events, and buying a few stocking stuffers. I intend to do that again this year.

If a confession were in order, I'd have to say that I've been anticipating Christmas since July when the big shopping channels introduced their Christmas in July sales. And, yes, I've had a steady stream of boxes delivered by UPS and USPS since then with more to come.

The real temptation for me though is not to forget Thanksgiving. I might set up my outside Christmas decorations right after Halloween, but it's due more to whenever the weather is decent. (I learned the hard way that it's difficult to decorate with any kind of flair when you can't feel your fingers.)

As a Lutheran, I observe Advent, the time leading up to the birth of Christ. I try very hard to not let the secular overcome the non-secular even when I'm reading Christmas books, watching Christmas movies, baking goodies, etc. But I'm also determined to devote time to Thanksgiving. It's something I try to do on a daily basis too.

Living life with a grateful heart offers many benefits. Perhaps the most important is contentment with what one has and the desire to share. Knowing that we are blessed, and by whom, translates into the commandment that Jesus gave us to love one another. I like that, and maybe that's one of the reasons why I like Christmas more than Halloween.

Marriage is a Gift

Marriage is a gift, not just for the two individuals involved, but for families and friends who join the celebration. And that was certainly the case when my oldest son and I made a six hour round trip to Omaha on Saturday to attend the nuptials of my great-nephew Zach.

Although I tease Zach about being a fan of Big Red (he's really a Corn Husker alumnus from Nebraska, but I delight in asking him why he likes the gum so much),  I was thrilled for him and excited to meet his new wife. Just seeing the joy at the union of two young people who are beginning their life together as one, is miraculous. Out of millions of people, when the right two find each other, that is a true blessing and gift.

Of course, no one enjoyed weddings more than Jesus, I think. After all, his first miracle was at a wedding in Cana when he turned water into wine. I can just imagine how overjoyed he finally was to do something special for the couple.

Connecting with others in common joy is a blessing. Seeing family members (whom we maybe haven't seen in years), meeting new people, and basking in the renewal of hope is a gift. It's also a reminder to those of us, who have lost our own special love, that God still continues to give us many good things in life.

Blessings and happy ever-after to Zach and Stacey!

What the World Needs Now...

I don't often show my emotions physically while listening to or reading news, but today I shed a few tears. It's not that I don't care deeply about the multitude of recent tragedies which occurred from national disasters, but something touched me particularly with the Las Vegas incident. Perhaps it was because it followed some senseless violence that left three dead and two wounded in my own home town in the early morning hours of Sunday. We aren't used to this, and I pray to God that we never become so.

I think my grief came mostly because of the innocence of the victims, and the inhumanity of those who committed the heinous crimes. What makes some humans want to hurt others? I still believe it is a minority of individuals who perpetrate such evil in the world, but I am most worried about how to respond.

Naturally the gun control debate will arise. Sure, criminals will always have guns, but they aren't the ones I am worried about anymore. I'm concerned about people like the Vegas gunman who seem to be okay and then go off on a rampage. We don't know why he did it, nor can we understand why some actions are borne of radical beliefs stemming from religion or race, for example.

It's a no-brainer that people, who don't know the proper use of guns or have a mental illness instability predisposed to harm, shouldn't have access to them. Regardless of how either side of the gun control debate feels, they should all agree that guns require a certain responsibility, and not everyone should be endowed with "the right" to have them. How to address that is the question.

But, how do we stop all of this madness where a man wants to kill others? It comes down to societal change, I think.Personally, I don't want to live in a world of fear, and I certainly don't want to live in a world where violence must be answered with violence.

Jesus proved true, positive change comes by changing the heart of man. In the end, I realize that may not happen with everyone, but perhaps we can still affect some change to make this world a better place, and that means we must look at ourselves.

How do we treat our fellowman? Do we constantly put ourselves first or do we actively try to answer some of the need that exists? Do we answer violence with violence? Do we promote justice and caring?

Perhaps what tragedy shows us most of all is that the greatest need is love, and I believe out of that will surely come the good that we seek instead of evil.

Good Days and Bad Days – September 22 is One of the Latter

Some days are ones you want to remember forever, and some are days you would rather forget. September 22 is one of the latter. It’s also the day that changed my life drastically.

Eleven years ago on that date, my beloved husband and soulmate left this world. I can’t begin to describe the devastation in my very being that accompanied that experience. Praying for a miracle until Steve’s last breath, I can only say that I did not feel anger at God, but I was extremely disappointed.Today, I still feel the pain of loss, but it is different.

If you’ve read many of my blogs, you’ve probably noted quite a few have regarded prayer, and my journey toward a deepening faith. Over the years, God has proven to me that He will help make lemonade out of lemons.

So what has the past shown me? Prayer is still important. Although I can’t fathom why Steve wasn’t spared, I do know this – death is not a punishment. How could an afterlife filled with love and understanding be bad?

I also know that God’s promise to be with us in time of trial is real. What I could not voice to others, I could to God. Lamentations, wailing, searching for answers were all in His domain; no one could understand them more than He.

While I would certainly rather have Steve beside me, healthy and loving, I know that God has provided me with opportunities to make some good from my tragedy (and, yes, I do consider his loss a tragedy).

• I have been given the gift of writing inspiration. To be able to touch and encourage others is quite remarkable.
• To be a Stephen Minister and help someone who is going through some of the same challenges I myself have been through, is a true privilege. To know that I am simply doing God’s work is a humbling honor. 
•  Realizing that our purpose in life is to love and encourage one another is a blessing. And to know that we have the power to make this world a better place for ourselves and others is highly gratifying.
• Simply to know that our lives have meaning, and that faith gives hope, is a true gift from God.

Eleven years ago, I could not speak my faith as I do now. That was partly due to not really understanding the full spectrum of my belief, and not actually acknowledging that it is He, and not I, who determines what is best for (and in) the world. Frankly, I’m glad that isn’t my responsibility, but most importantly, I have comfort and peace in knowing Steve is in good hands until eternity unites us once again.

Hype and Reality

Although the eclipse was to be 99.3% in our area, it appeared more like the darkening skies before a rain storm. Initially, two of my neighbors and I anticipated the hype surrounding the total eclipse of the sun might actually yield something spectacular, even though we fell out of the total blackout path.

The lampposts in my community sensed that it was nearing evening even though it was just 1pm, the insects began their chirping, and we could feel a slight drop in temperature. But, alas, it was not our fate to experience the majesty of the event. Heavy cloud cover prevented us from even a peek at the moon crossing between the earth and sun.

So, for the three of us who donned chairs by the community mailbox and looked skyward, the hype didn't meet our expectations. But, it was reality and certainly did meet, and even exceed, that of others.

I guess we could equate that somewhat to faith. Sometimes we maybe expect too much, but that doesn't mean that it's wrong to do so, or won't happen − just maybe not for us. Take for instance the prayers for a miracle cure for a loved one (been there, done that). It's disappointing and sometimes disparaging not to bear witness to it, but there are still many miracles that happen all around us.

It's easy to hype our expectation, but when the outcome is not what we wanted or anticipated, we have to remember that it still doesn't negate the reality that it can and does happen. I think that is what faith in prayer is all about − answers are sometimes, yes; sometimes, no; and sometimes, not for us but for others.

I won't be here in approximately 100 years when the total eclipse again occurs in my area, but there are other locations where the total eclipse will occur as early as in 2024. I'd love to see it personally, but even though I probably won't, I know the hype (just like prayers) will still be reality for some.

The Shack Reaction

I've read The Shack by William Paul Young twice − once when it was first published and then before renting the newly released movie.  I was grateful that the movie pretty much followed the book since one of my biggest pet peeves is when a movie doesn't.

The story offers a different approach to God's view of the world, one to which I know some Biblical scholars even subscribe in regard to God's "punishment." I will leave it at that. The movie did fail to include what I consider one of the most important aspects of the book which more or less proves the experience of the main character to be true. I'll leave it at that, too.

My biggest concern, however, wasn't the movie or its message. It was people's reaction to it as stated in their comments.

On one hand, you have a religious sect that takes exception with the way God is portrayed. He can't be black or a woman, and you must incur the wrath of God. Some of what these Christians cite to approbate their beliefs (not unsurprisingly) is from the Old Testament. I won't speak any judgment on that, but I prefer and believe in the loving God whom Jesus introduced us to in the New Testament.

Now, on the other hand, you have the atheists. I honestly don't know why they even bothered to see the movie, and maybe they actually didn't. There was a good deal of profanity. disdain, and outright loathing for Christians in some of their comments. I think this disturbed me more than the presumed fundamentalists who truly think they speak God's word.

I wondered what in someone's life would cause them to so vehemently deny that there is something greater than themselves. You can explain how things happened to create this world, but where did it begin? Substance had to come from somewhere.

In the end, it wasn't the difference in what I believe versus their non-belief that disturbed me. I simply felt sad for them. I also felt sad for the world because these are not the people who make our world a better place. Hate of any kind, from any group, never makes a positive difference for mankind.

I've known some very good, caring and kind people who were atheist or agnostic so the people who made these disparaging comments carried something different with them. The "great sadness" in The Shack refers to a specific matter, but I think there is another sadness that needs our prayers.

Compliments and When to Accept Them

I don't have any narcissistic delusions or over-exaggerated problems with humility, but compliments are sometimes difficult for me to accept, dependent of course on what they are. When someone praises my writing, I often find it difficult to take credit − I know where my inspiration comes from. But yesterday, I had no problem accepting two compliments.

For many years, I've served as a lector at my church. At first, it was a little daunting because I always read at the service which was broadcast live via our local radio station. It's not that I'm shy (as anyone who knows me will attest); it's just that I didn't want to mess up reading something so important.

Years later, I now say a little prayer before I read scripture because I really want my voice to carry the profound nature of the subject matter. I want there to be no question about the message of what I am saying to convey God's word. Simply put, I want my voice to honor God.

Yesterday, two people told me I was successful. (Others have done so in the past, but yesterday was especially meaningful.) The first told me he always enjoys it when I read. The second thanked me for reading because it was important to him for passages to be read with authority. He could really "hear God's words coming through my mouth." Now that is a compliment! It's not praise for me and what a good job I did, but rather a confirmation that God answered my little prayer to give glory to His word.

I keep thinking of something our Pastor said in a recent sermon. He asked us to think about where we fit in, much like teenagers trying to find their place in society. I guess we all go through that awkwardness upon accepting a Christian life. Where do we end and where does God begin? The simple answer, I think, is that God is within us and we just have to decide if we accept His direction rather than our own. I admit that discerning that difference is sometimes a challenge.

I think, or I hope, I'm getting better about understanding and doing God's will rather than my own. At least I know that my prayer as a lector yesterday must have been right.

PF Day!

July 12 is PF Day, otherwise known as Patent File Day. This is the day my son Chris and I file utility (non-provisional) and design patents for a new mobility walker. After more than two years of honing our design, numerous prototypes, financial investment and loss of sleep, we are taking the final plunge following a patent pending application made a year ago on July 12, 2016.

This is truly one of those times where we have to say, "it's in God's hands now." In fact, there were many anxious moments when I had to talk to myself with encouragement. It always came back to Romans 8:28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

The aforementioned comforting verse clearly means trust in the Lord, but in actuality, trusting God wasn't the hardest part. It was trying to decide if this project was my will or God's, even though I'm sure it was devinely inspired. Nevertheless, you can bet a few prayers went in that direction!

So now I say it's in God's hands. If it is a success, I'll definitely know it was more than just my desire to bring a new and truly innovative product to market − one which could help many people. It might also make me a better philanthropist, but that's a selfish wish on my part because sharing our blessings with others is truly one of our greatest gifts.

So now we wait to see what God has planned as I approach medical manufactures and distributors. In any case, I don't need to stress over the outcome because I am more than grateful to know it is in His hands, and He is the one in charge.

Still Relevant

Our Pastor gave another very provocative sermon Sunday about a subject that I once thought irrelevant to me or to most other Christians in the U.S. The sermon was in reference to Jesus telling the disciples people will "hate you because of me."

Persecution of Christians only happens now in certain countries or areas with no tolerance to our religion, right? But the Pastor explained this a little differently, and one to which I could now relate. It references how we see things, what we do, and how we act. And sometimes, that does get us into trouble. It doesn't mean consequences of martyrdom by any means, but there can still be a negative response.

Pastor Brian's point was simply that, unfavorable responses aside, we should still do what is right regardless of how others see us or disagree. And, yes, I have to admit there are times when that's gotten me those unfavorable responses from others. I suspect that can be said for many of us.

Even other Christians disagree about how we should act and what we should believe. Just look at the derision during and after the last presidential campaign. Everything centers on understanding what it means to follow Jesus, and it's a little spooky and unsettling to me to see how that differs among members of our own religion. In the end, I think that Jesus' commandment to love one another surpasses all else.


As my personal faith deepens, I do things differently than I once did, and I see priorities differently too. It's not so much about me anymore, what I want, or personal preference in relating to others. I see Jesus' commandment as mainly twofold: Trying not to purposely hurt other people (which I may inadvertently do because all humans fail); and focusing on kindness and need. I'm far from perfect in doing any of that, but I'm going to keep trying to do the right thing as Pastor Brian said.

Some Losses Are Harder Than Expected

I really thought I could handle the death of non-family members well enough to someday even help with hospice. As a Stephen Minister with my church, I already try to help those who have been left behind. But last week, I was forced to realize something - some of those non-family losses are still very hard to accept.

My wonderfully, sweet neighbor, and owner of the other side of my townhome, passed away. For nearly 10 years, Stan Hamilton was a fixture in my life with his characteristic grin and great sense of humor. He was also the first person I met in our community when I was looking to buy. He graciously allowed a real estate agent, who was showing me another floor plan, to invade his home so that I could see a different layout option.

Long story short, we became friends over the years. He even served as the editor of my first book before I queried publishers, and after that, he was one of the most supportive people of my writing. As an author, former reporter and editor, he was the perfect mentor too. I think he was also the one to suggest I join Kansas Authors Club, an organization that has served me well.

Stan was always the perfect neighbor - quiet and caring. He brought the newspaper from my driveway to my mailbox on the house so that I could easily retrieve it. Although I constantly worried that he might fall using his cane, he told others that it was one of the things that brought joy to him. I could only reciprocate by bringing him an occasional dinner or treat, and then most recently, drag his trash/recycle bins out of his garage for pick-up. I thought I would lose him to assisted living someday, but not entirely.


My two sons, as well as any visitors, became well acquainted with Stan. He could often be seen riding his stationary bike with his garage door open, something he always tried to do, even in his frail condition. There was always a friendly hello to anyone nearby, and I usually made a point to stop by his door to let him see my grand-dog when Danny visited overnight.

It was a always a pleasure, too, to see Stan's family over the years. I know my tears pale in comparison to theirs, but what a legacy this kind and gentle spirit left! I will never pull into my garage without thinking of Stan next door and wishing he were still with us.

I saw Stan just a day or two before his stroke. I was getting into my car, racing to a meeting, and he was going to the group mailboxes across the street. We spoke just briefly about what we were doing, contrary to our normal routine to stop and chat, but we were both on a mission that day. I had no idea it would be the last time we would talk.

When I visited Stan in the hospital (after his stroke, subsequent heart attack with discovery of 70% blockage, bleeding ulcer, and pneumonia), he was heavily sedated. I hope he knew that I was there and heard me say, "God is going to have a lot of fun with Stan." And I truly believe that is what's  happening now.

My Comfort Zone

Recently, Chicken Soup for the Soul solicited its previous contributors to submit a story for one of the series forthcoming anthologies tentatively titled Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone. I didn't think much about it because I couldn't quite recall any important experience of that nature. So much for my willingness and desire for change!

But then something hit the idea center of my brain -- I could write about the promotion I received  decades ago when I moved to the corporate office of the company for which I worked.

I really wanted that promotion, and it had been my dream for years to move up the corporate career ladder. And now, it was finally presented to me. I would be responsible for placing our after school programs in public elementary schools, something some of our competitors were already doing. The only drawback was working directly for the vice president of the company.

Being a corporate director was a highly visible and responsible position. If I failed, everyone in the would know it, and not only would I lose my job, but also my career. Conversely, if I succeeded, everyone would know that too. In the end, ambition won out over fear.

To make a long story short, that program didn't prove very successful for the company or for me, but another opportunity took its place. This time, it was the perfect fit and became an actual department which I led for almost 11years. So from all of this I realized: Stepping out of one's comfort zone might result in failure, but that failure might also turn into something better.

And then it occurred to me this was much like stepping out of my comfort zone to talk about my faith. I dare say that it is a difficult task for most all of us. No one wants others to be self conscious around us, or to think we're some kind of zealot to be avoided. But then came another realization -- it gradually becomes easier, just like performing the duties of a new job. "Practice makes perfect" applies just as well when "witnessing" to one's faith.

In talking or writing about my beliefs, I have many reasons for not wanting people to see me as an example. (Now that really does make me feel uncomfortable!) No one should follow what I do; they should follow the one whom I try to follow -- Jesus. My life is simply happier because of that, and that is what people should see.

You'll never hear me confront others and ask them "are you saved?" You'll never hear me push my faith on others, but I won't let my comfort zone prevent me from talking about it when given the right moment. Those moments are not made by me, they're made by God so, in this circumstance, I'm especially glad to have escaped my comfort zone.

The Perfect Double Gift

My 4th story for Chicken Soup for the Soul appeared in their most recent anthology, Random Acts of Kindness that was released in February. I love their books as does my entire family, especially when one of my stories appear. So, it was no surprise when one of my nieces-in-law, Linda, requested the latest book for her birthday. 

Because Linda and my other niece-in-law Val have March birthdays, my sister always hosts a family party to celebrate their birthdays along with one of my nephews. It's a great, big, extended family celebration, but it's sometimes difficult to come up with something interesting and different as a gift.

I remembered that Val had also asked about the book earlier, so it was an easy decision to give them both a book as a present. I decided also to give them each microlights which seem to currently be a big trend in decorating. And then another idea occurred: Add a simple $5 Walmart gift card that they could use to perform their own random act of kindness!

What happened then is very special. Val knew immediately that she would give the card to one of the needy individuals who is often seen standing at a highway off-ramp, something she often does. It didn't take long for her to discover someone who would appreciate the card.

But, the most remarkable story came from Linda. She was shopping at Walmart and heard an elderly lady in the next aisle talking to a clerk. "Don't you have something a little cheaper?" she asked. "I don't have the extra $4 to spend." When the clerk said no, Linda popped around the corner to give the woman the $5 gift card.

Are you sensing the same divine intervention that I did? The woman was short $4 so the $5 gift card covered the deficit and the taxes. Now that's what I would call somewhat of a miracle! It not only won the gratitude of the recipient, but made Linda feel so good inside too. That's a double gift, and now Linda wants to carry more gift cards to give out for just such occurrences. She learned what Val already knew about random acts of kindness.

Who would believe that something so simple as a $5 gift card could bring such happiness to the givers and the recipients. God, through Jesus, certainly knew what He was doing when He commanded us to love and care for one another. Now that's what I call a truly double gift!

What Happened to Easter?

Easter is the most important holiday to Christians, or at least, it is supposed to be. It surpasses Christmas because Jesus' birth wouldn't have been important without His resurrection. That's why it is so mind boggling that it has become just another day for so many people.

Because I wasn't feeling well, I missed Easter services - something I really disliked having to do because I had every intention to attend and I enjoy the wonderful celebration. I would have missed Easter dinner at my sister's, too, except that I was bringing dessert. I'm sure God forgave me for missing church, but you don't want to fail your family by not bringing what is almost as important as the entree.

Granted, Christmas is celebrated secularly and non-secularly, and I believe doing so with Easter isn't really a change from decades ago either. But, while my faith has certainly deepened over the ages to celebrate on a more non-secular level, there are things I truly miss from my childhood.

I remember receiving a new outfit every Easter. Usually it was very dressy and something to show off to my grandmother on Easter Sunday when we traveled to her home an hour and half away. It might even be worn on an occasional visit to church, but much of my early years were spent as a CEO (Christmas and Easter Only, as said by my niece Kym). Still, I knew what the holiday was really about.

In grade school, we had Good Friday off as well as the following Monday. We sang Easter songs and made paper Easter baskets that my teachers filled with chocolate or creme eggs. I remember also the sheer joy of finding and counting how many baskets and nests were left for me to find on Easter morning. I even recall the 3' tall stuffed Easter bunny that my father slipped in my arms when I was 13 and sleeping  But what I don't recall is seeing crowded store parking lots like they were on Easter at Home Depot and Menard's as I traveled to my sister's home just outside of town.

It's unfortunate that stores (I'm sure there were many more than the DIYs) couldn't even be closed on Easter, and even more sad that so many people thought they needed to shop. So much for the reverence of Easter! Add that to little TV programming for the holiday, and the fact that some  network decision makers obviously don't know the Old Testament from the New Testament because what they do run are shows like "The Ten Commandments" and "Sodom and Gomorrah." I had to wait for "The Robe," and "The Greatest Story Every Told" until the actual day of Easter.  Granted, there were a few other good programs like "Killing Jesus, Finding Jesus," and others focusing on Jesus' DNA and the Shroud of Turin.

I think the overall issue here is that it's too easy to forget our Creator. Too many people miss the joy and peace that come with a belief in something far greater than oneself. So, for my part, I'm going to do my best to live my faith, and celebrate what should be celebrated. Example, as Jesus so perfectly demonstrated, is often the best way to affect change. (And, yes, I did make the sugar cookies from scratch in the photo that accompanies this blog entry.)😃

Lent and the Spiritual Journey

I'm ready to admit that I don't know everything, especially when it comes to understanding God. But once in a while, I'm given a little ray of light in the way of wisdom. That occurs mostly with self-reflection which is a focus during the 40 days (not including Sundays) leading up to Easter.


The danger in self-reflection, however, can be to become so consumed with oneself that we lose focus on our creator. In fact, I'm convinced that true happiness only comes when we look beyond ourselves and make the focus on each other and how God wants us to live.


Recently, I read a book called Proof of God which contained a message that I thought was perfect: "church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints." Amen!  You don't have to look far to see that people always fall short of perfection, no matter what they believe.


I always try to remember that others may judge God by my actions. That certainly isn't a fair assessment of God or what it is to be a believer because I cannot ever live up to what others want me to be, regardless of how hard I try. But, I'm still obligated to try, and that is something all of us should maybe keep for self-reflection, too. Expectations are greater, but as I often told my subordinates, never stop trying for 100%, even when you know it's not possible, because the moment you strive for less, the less you will accomplish.


So in this time of self-reflection, I'm going to instead focus on how I can do better and follow more of Jesus' teachings. I'm going to look beyond myself, after acknowledging where I need to improve, and try to do what I think we each have a responsibility to do - make this world a little better place.

Unknown Value

At a recent meeting of my district's Kansas Authors Club, we had a writing assignment based upon props brought by attendees. One prop passed around was a piece of cement. It looked like an ordinary block of discarded rubble, and as I held it in my hands, I wondered why anyone would bring this as a prop to inspire creative writing.

Then, after the cement made its way around the table, the owner announced that it was a piece of the Berlin Wall. What a difference that bit of information made! Suddenly, something that seemed so insignificant became a valued piece of history.

Later, I began to wonder how many times I encountered something that was dismissed as insignificant, and missed an opportunity to know its true value. I realized, too, that this occurs with  human beings as well. How often have I missed the opportunity to know my fellowman when the contact could have enriched both of our lives?

The Bible tells us that we are all God's children, from the least to the richest. Looking at poor, uneducated individuals may give us pause and a desire to help, but do we see their value? Thankfully,  God does, I believe.

Someone may look upon any of us as having less value than him/herself. Without question, we are deemed the inferior to somebody, just as we may feel the superior to others. But this is only in circumstance, not what really matters.

I believe God does not value us because of the possessions or talents we have or don't have. After all, He is the one who gave them to us to use for the good of others (Romans 12:6-9). Instead and fortunately, He is able to look at us and not see a piece of rubble to be discarded. He sees our true value and what we can bring to the world.

 From now on, I too hope I can see that a little better myself.

Another Ah-ha Moment on Prayer

It has taken me more than 10 years on the subject, but I finally had another ah-ha moment. This time in regard to prayer.

When my husband was told he was terminal with 3 months to live, we both cried. It was then I began to pray incessantly for a miracle. Sometimes that would be for an entire hour before I could even think of sleeping. And when the doctor told us, "you need to get your affairs in order. Do you understand what I'm saying?" we understood all too well.

My prayers became more frequent and fervent. My supplications were almost vigilant as every moment was spent pleading for Steve's life. I prayed for a miracle up until his last breath.

Surprisingly, I was never mad at God for not granting my prayer (along with the prayer of numerous others), but I was certainly disappointed. Didn't I do what we are told to do and pray continuously and with focus? Didn't I have faith that God would grant my prayer? I thought so.

Before closing my eyes the other night, I realized something - my epiphany regarding prayer. In praying for that miracle, I acknowledged two things: 1) I am not the one in control, and 2) I believe God can do anything. It's also how I learned to talk to God throughout the day.

Although my mind may now wander sometimes during my nightly prayer (Max Lucado even admitted the same in his book, Before Amen: The Power of a Simple Prayer), God has my attention throughout the day, if only in shortened intervals. He did not grant my miracle, but He gave me increased faith and a more personal connection through prayer, regardless of whether it is answered yes or no.

I do have two reoccurring payers which are said after communion, and in my nightly prayer, both of which I'm 100% will be granted in some way. After communion, I ask God to "make me ever mindful of His sacrifice and presence." In my nightly prayer, I ask God "to help me know and do His will."  Both are critical to a life of faith.

So now I realize that the act of praying is as important as the request made in a prayer, and I'd love to know why some receive the answers they do. But in the end, I think I'm learning more about the nature of prayer - it is our actual relationship with the creator, and just like any relationship that is meant to endure, it has an unknown (to us) future, requires trust, relies sometimes on patience, and must have love as its foundation.

Celebrating a "One-sided" Anniversary

Two days ago, I celebrated my 44th wedding anniversary. I celebrated it just as I have, since Steve passed on 10 years ago, by going out to dinner with my two sons. They are the two closest things I have to Steve, and I see so much of him in Chris and Ryan.

I also have a standing order for flowers on the altar of my church around the 26th of January to commemorate the anniversary. It helps me to reminisce about the day that so profoundly changed my life in many ways, and I believe, made me a better person. Without that day, I also would not have the faith that has become so important to me.

I've begun to see marriage differently over the years. Having been blessed to wed my soulmate, I wonder how our relationship will be in the afterlife. When asked who will be the husband of the woman who had had many husbands, Jesus said that there is no marriage in Heaven. Bummer! Of course, he did indicate that relationships will continue and on a more deeper level, but I admit I'm still a little confused about how that will be.

I know that marriage was an institution created to bring about family. Procreation was a focus and there no longer is that need in the afterlife, hence, no marriage. The problem is I want to be Steve's wife, and I want him to be my husband. But I think the issue really lies in verbiage. Words only  define what a relationship is - they are not the description.

So, what do I say to those lucky enough to still have their soulmates in physical form? I say Happy Anniversary! Enjoy this earthly relationship, but I truly hope the best is yet to come.

A Recommendation

As mentioned previously, during the last year and a half plus, I've been editing a memoir for a friend and fellow M.S. advocate. What might not have been mentioned is that we both believe that this joint venture to bring his book to fruition was not a coincidence.

I am going to recommend it to anyone who wants a good read, and especially if they want to see how God works in the lives of others. Although I had known Mark since 2000, there were so many things I didn't know, among them being that he worked on several European crusades for Billy Graham, smuggled Bibles behind the Iron Curtain, worked as a field director for Habitat for Humanity, and the list goes on.

With his permission, I am including one short snippet about Bible smuggling from his book, A Journey Worth Taking: God, M.S. and Me:

     “When in Rome, do as the Romans do,” is something that you say which means you should behave and dress like the people in the country you are visiting. In my case, I shouldn’t look like an American. So I didn’t. I wore clothes from another country in Europe. To cross borders, my staff believed I could pass as a Moroccan so I had to temporarily convert to being a Muslim, including dress and learning a few Arabic phrases like “peace be unto you” or the equivalent of “hi” in English.

     Looking like a Muslim needed a complete make-over. I kept my hair very short, grew my goatee long to about two inches, and grew out my eye brows. Oh, the real make-over was my skin color which was already natural brown. God knew what He was doing by sending me to the country of former Yugoslavia which has a high population of Muslims.

     I really never had any language problems, because whenever I had to speak English, I did so with a strong accent of some type. 

Mark also has some very entertaining stories about his youth, but my favorite is when, at age 10, he made astronauts out of his pet hamsters. A close second is when he decided to test the theory that cats always land on their feet, but not to worry. Fortunately, there isn't a bad ending.

Enjoy, and please do share this with others who might want to read about faith at work. We can all use a little inspiration.

You can find Mark's book on Amazon at: https://www.amazon.com/Journey-Worth-Taking-God-M-S/dp/1537422006/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1484775379&sr=8-1&keywords=mark+abraham

 

Making This World a Little Better Goal

Anyone who read my New Year's resolution last year knows that I vowed to keep a daily log of at least one thing I did to make this world a little better place. I'm happy to say that I fulfilled my goal. That is, I kept track. I can't say that I always made the world a better place, but at least I tried!

It was a very good lesson for me to realize that it takes a concerted effort to make a positive difference. It's not that it's difficult to do, but that one must really focus on it. There are so many ways to achieve what I set out to do: financial donations, volunteering of time, random acts of kindness (Look for one of my stories about how I was actually a recipient of such in the February 2017 release of Chicken Soup for the Soul: Random Acts of Kindness edition), etc.

Some days, I just made an effort to smile and maybe converse with someone I didn't know. Other days, I made financial, charitable contributions. And then on occasion, I really went out of my way to do something kind or served others in a special way.

Now, I must confess, there were 12 days where I didn't write anything in my log. One of those days, I was too sick to do anything but make it briefly out of bed. As for the other 11 days, it wasn't that I didn't do anything; I just forgot to make an entry.

The interesting thing about our positive actions is that we never know how positive they are. I'd like to think that I maybe made someone's day a little better and they were glad that I was in this world. I'd like to think that maybe my actions influenced them to do the same thing for someone else. I'd like to think that my one positive action kept multiplying with each person doing something good, and truly, together, we all made this world a little better place, if only for a couple of hours or even a day.

So my resolution for 2017? More of the same. I already have my three entries for this year. And I would like to encourage anyone reading this blog to just try doing what I'm doing. Let's take the negatives out of life and start concentrating on the good we can do, and the difference we can make.

Can you make the world a better place if you try? I'm sure of it!